Uncomfortable, good!

You should be uncomfortable! Uncomfortable is a good thing. In our culture, we have an unrealistic expectation that we should be in everlasting comfort and we are surprised, often angered when we are uncomfortable. We have the messaging, “there must be something wrong.” If you’re uncomfortable, good! There is so much to be uncomfortable about. If what you see and hear about in areas of race, gender and sexuality, makes you uncomfortable, that feeling of discomfort is in you. By denying this, we project our feelings onto others and say, “no, there’s something wrong with you!”

The real task is to look at what is making you uncomfortable. What is going on in you that is being denied? This is where real growth begins. When we stop looking outwards blaming others for our discomfort and start looking inward at ourselves, growth is possible. There’s a saying in recovery communities that goes, “get comfortable being uncomfortable.”

By sitting with and addressing our discomfort, by taking a stark look at ourselves, we have the opportunity to find our true self. We find all the parts of us. We find wholeness.